Inner Dialogue vs. Inner Guru, by Heather Falkin

You enter the room, pick the perfect spot to place your mat, roll it out as quietly as possible, sit down in Sukhasana (easy pose) and wait for the teacher to begin the practice. You have made a point of not allowing the circumstances of your day to get in the way of relaxing but now that you are here it feels like there is a tape recorder playing back the entirety of your day in your mind. You're thinking about what you said to this person, what you should have said to that person, all the things you didn't get done, and all the things you need to do. Then you find yourself trying to distract these thoughts by focusing on what is going on in the room. You notice all the other people coming into the class; how they look, where they are placing their mats. You are now people watching which starts up a whole new internal dialogue so you distract yourself further by looking at the clock. You begin to wonder if class will start on time or run longer than scheduled and you are right back to thinking about all you have to do, what you should or could have done and why you are here instead of somewhere else "doing" something more productive. You have forgotten that your yoga practice is about just "being".

Often when we come to our mats we are not ready to be present with what is going on below the surface of these habitual thought patterns. We unconsciously distract ourselves with mental busyness in order to escape what we ultimately keep coming back to rediscover. Beyond our thoughts and actions lies a stillness that emerges from the core of our being and is often referred to as the Inner Guru, the Light or the Spirit. It is Divine in nature and exists within everything. We know it's there not just because our teacher has described it to us but because we have experienced it during our practice. When we do, nothing matters more than that feeling of oneness, or wholeness that seems to give us permission to just be, because being is enough.

So as challenging as it may seem at times to show up for class, you do. Despite all the mental, physical, and emotional energy it takes to stay for the full 90 minutes you are always glad you did. You come out of Savasana (corpse pose) and just for a moment you are awakened to the divinity within and all around you. The mental chatter quiets, or maybe stills completely and you are filled with a sense of gratitude for the opportunity to practice yoga and for the Inner Guru that guides you.